Fingerprinting appointment - check

We aren't a "GPS" party of two. I love my atlas, mapquest, and the challenge of trying to get somewhere using a compass. Still, I didn't want to get lost today...on the way to our fingerprinting appointment.

So I mapquested it. And then, just for good measure, I tried to find the phone number. I didn't find it. But I did find something like this, "The USCIS Naperville Office is really hard to find. So here are the GPS coordinates. Plus, it's right behind the Lazy Boy Gallery."

Without that helpful bit of information, we'd still be driving around Naperville (which happens to have a really neat downtown and a neat, independent bookstore. At least, we've heard the bookstore is cool. We ran out of patience before we found a parking spot), but the USCIS office is right behind (as in, the same building) the Lazy Boy Gallery. It does not face the street and doesn't even say USCIS on it. So I thank the nameless person on the internet who helped us find our way.

I've heard stories about the fingerprinting appointment. They won't let you in early. Not nice people. 

We were pleasantly surprised. The lady was very helpful and we waited for 20 seconds.

We expect the wait for our approval letter will be longer. Perhaps a month, so probably no updates on here for awhile :).

Fingerprinting appointment!

We knew the letters were coming any day.

Still, when I saw the Department of Homeland Security/USCIS letters in our mailbox, I was excited!

They informed us of our fingerprinting appointment on December 21. In Naperville. We were hoping for Bloomington, but we'll deal with this. No problem.

Approximately 2-4 weeks after our fingerprinting appointment, we should receive our approval letter from the USCIS. Then, we prepare our dossier, send it off to our adoption agency, and they send it off to Poland.

At that point, we should have about 12 months to wait.

Adoption Agency Approves Homestudy!

I just got an emailed invoice today. Normally, I would not be excited about another bill, but this one means that our homestudy has been approved by our adoption agency. Once I receive the official approval letter, we send off our USCIS paperwork. We are getting closer to having the paperwork done, and then we'll just be waiting. And waiting...and waiting.

I thought this would be a good time to share something that Bryan and I have been thinking about.

(Stepping up on soapbox).

One of our challenges with considering adoption has been trading the safe, secure, delightful life we have now, for a future that we know nothing about. We spend a lot of time together; we have little financial stress; we do what we want when we want to do it.

After spending time with friends with young children, I am reminded of how easy our life really is. (And by easy, I mean that we're footloose and fancy-free. Of course, we have challenges and heartaches and frustrations. Just like everyone else.)

We know that adoption will have its own joys, but frankly, it will have challenges that we know we are not equipped to handle. Our life changes go from the mundane differences (having little people who will mess up the house and add more stuff to our somewhat barren house. Yes, we like it that way.) to the major (being responsible for their spiritual upbringing, their health, sleepless nights, crazy days, mental anguish, and perhaps other issues, like attachment problems).

Most people have been positive about this change in our life. Others have not. And if you have reservations, we get that. We have them, too. This isn't an attack on anyone.

But this is what Bryan and I have thought about: Since when has God wanted us to be selfish? Since when has God wanted us to protect what we have by keeping it to ourselves? Since when is the safety, predictability, and ease of our life worth more than a child (or children) who has no parents, who doesn't have a place to call home, who probably doesn't know about God and His son, and who will leave the orphanage/foster care at 18 and NEVER have a place to come home to? What happens to these children?

I admit that I always thought adoption was a "nice" thing to do. I didn't realize that it was so hard. And I never really thought about what happens to children who don't get adopted. Imagine all the decisions they have to make at 18 years old. Alone.

We know we will make mistakes. We hope that when we do that it won't get blamed on our children for being adopted. We pray that people will understand the advantages that their own children have had (being loved, snuggled, needs always met, never starving, secure, not dealing with rejection, trauma, or neglect) and to be compassionate to our children who may not have had those advantages.

I don't think that God wants everyone to adopt. But I do believe (reference James 1:27) that He does want everyone to be involved with the fatherless. There are many ways to do that other than adoption. It can make a difference to one soul, and that is why Bryan and I have started down this challenging road.

(Stepping down from soapbox.)

May you find something today that "stretches" your comfort zone, but advances the Gospel and brings glory to our Father.

Another Baby Step

We are on our way to Minnesota and, because of an aircard (Thanks, Kim!), I was able to check our email and find that our homestudy was approved by the State of Illinois!
Next steps: send our homestudy copies to United States Citizenship and Immigration Services and our adoption agency.
Our adoption agency told me that we are probably looking at a 12 month wait...after our dossier gets submitted to Poland.

No criminals here!

I've lost track of how long we've been waiting on our background clearances. Who am I kidding? I've been counting the days: 14 weeks.
At first, it was supposed to take 4-6 weeks. At the 6 week mark, I contacted our social worker. She explained that the wait was now 2-3 months. At the 3 month mark, she contacted someone somewhere (I lose track of the acronyms) who said, "No, they aren't done. And, no, I have no idea when they will be done."
I "patiently" waited until this week before contacting our social worker again. "Is there someone I can call? We can wait, but it would be nice to know how long to expect."
She gave me a phone number.
I called Monday.
The DCFS Advocate called me back on Tuesday.
She was very nice, but our conversation went something like this: "I have no idea how long to tell you to expect to wait. I don't know what the holdup is. I don't know where the holdup is. It could be the FBI part, the state police part, etc. No, you can't call anyone else, because no one knows. And the State Police won't talk to you."
"There's nothing I can do?" I said. I tried to be assertive, yet unaggressive.
"Tell you what," she said. "When you get to the point that this is the only thing you're waiting on, give me a call back and I will see if I can make some phone calls."
Me: "Actually, that is the only thing we're waiting on." And that has been the only thing we've been waiting on for 3 months.
There were more "she said/i said" things, but the most important thing is the result which was...

A PHONE CALL TODAY FROM HER THAT SAID OUR CLEARANCES HAVE BEEN ENTERED INTO THE SYSTEM (today) and that our agency would get it sometime soon. She did not, however, tell me exactly what "soon" meant.

So I emailed our social worker and she said she will be looking for the clearances. Incidentally, our clearance were, well, clear :).

We're new at all this stuff, but I think that our homestudy (along with precious clearances) goes to the State of Illinois for approval. Then it goes to our adoption agency for approval (although that shouldn't take long as they've already seen it once). Sometime in there, we submit our I-800A form. Fortunately, it's mostly completed and documentation for that was gathered months ago.

We like progress, and this is a big step.

Dzien dobry

Bryan and I are trying to learn a few words of Polish...and let me tell you, it's hard.
I wish you could listen to us stumbling over the Polish words.
Egg. Jajko. Sandwich. Kanapka. The odd-lettered words that I can't type.
"Dzie" sounds like "J".
Yes, Polish is hard.
Reminds me of a talk I heard recently. A college president was speaking to us, and he believes that everyone under the right circumstances can learn anything. He was telling someone that. And that person said, "I don't believe you."
"I have been trying to learn German for years. I have taken classes, I have spent hours in study, I have gone to Germany. But I can't learn German!"
"Well," said the college president, "then it's a good thing you weren't born in Germany."
It's a good thing I was born in the U.S. and not Poland, eh?

Loving a Child

Last night, we went to the birthday party of my one-year-old nephew. First of all, he is the first baby in my family for 4.5 years. And we love our nephews. Several people have watched my family fight over him and said, "There isn't enough of him to go around."
Yes, we love him and his cousins.
As I read the scrapbook his mother made, read his birthday cards, and watched him being cuddled and snuggled and tossed up into the air, it made me sad for the children who don't have this.
What about the 143,000,000 million orphans in our world? Some don't have enough food, clothing, shelter, safety, and love.
What are you going to do about it?

Adoption Contemplation

Before I (Lisa) got married, I thought that adoption might be part of my life. Sometime. Then, we were married, and through some challenging things, conception of biological children looked unlikely. Yet, both of us were happy and content.
I strongly felt that I should not concentrate on what we didn't have, but what we did have. Instead, I wanted to trust God to refine us in whatever way He wanted to. Then, I heard something that gave me such courage. A woman who struggled with infertility for eleven years said this: "If there had been any other way for God to make me who He wanted me to be, He would have done it. For some reason, infertility was necessary in my life. And God knew how painful and how hard it was, but I trust Him with my life."
Through the years, we talked about adoption periodically, but we weren't ready to start. Someday, I will explain what made me pick up the phone and call.
In March, 2011, I called The Baby Fold and found they do adoptive parent training every 2-3 months. Due to an upcoming surgery, we declined that spot, but called in April to get into the May 23rd training. Our social worker, Lara, came out to our house on May 2 with a mountain of paperwork. On May 23rd, we were sufficiently overwhelmed with more paperwork.
I am convinced that adoption is necessary when I hear stories of abandonment, poverty and abuse. I understand that true religion is visiting the fatherless and the widows in their affliction. I know that institutionalization, children growing up without parents, and living in an environment without love or nurturing is not the best way to grow servants for the King.
But this adoption decision has not been an easy one.